Selfish

I’m really lost now. In past, I’m a gal who lack of confident, do not concerns to the things happened around me, I don’t know how to care other person, including family and friends. I used to be a selfish gal, most of the time, I seldom sharing with other, fail to mix with friends, what inside my brain maybe is just my own interest.
Recently, I do feel that I’m alone always. Keep on doesn’t satisfy with what I own, I wish to have more close friends, anywhere, that’s only a wish. Ya, that’s might be my personality have problems thus lead to this consequence. Due with this kind of situations, I have the strong feelings to hide myself, that’s what I always do- avoid what I don’t wish to face with.
For m brother, I always feel that since me myself too fail to discipline myself, how do I have the ability to teach him to become good? It’s really a funny joke. I’m really a failure.